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One: My name is not Vanessa.

Two: The answer to each and every one of the questions you are asking me is contained in the email to which you are replying. They're not even hidden. They're the whole point.

Three: The same email gives you the name and phone number/extension of the collector you should be contacting.

Four: If this is representative of the way you run your business, it's not hard to understand why your vendor has referred you for collections.

Five: I have not had enough caffeine this morning to take your idiocy in stride. I shall therefore mock you on LJ.

No love,
Val

And people wonder why I'm abjectly grateful my position generally doesn't entail dealing directly with these people...

Comments

( 23 comments — Leave a comment )
ariestess
Dec. 14th, 2007 12:01 pm (UTC)
*giggles* Is that like the idiots who call in to me on a daily basis, saying "I was messing around on my phone and randomly pressing buttons and now,

A] I lost all my contacts. You NEED to get them back for me because this phone is my business. [Nope, we don't store that for you, moron!]

B] I lost all my favorite downloaded ringtones/wallpapers/games/applications/pictures I took. You can send them to me, right? [Nope, you were an idiot, you can pay to re-download them.]

C] My phone says "sim disabled." What's that mean? It said "sim blocked," and I randomly pressed buttons some more until it said this. Now what? [Now? You're fucked. Go to a service center, buy a new sim for $35 and hope you can remember all of your info, because it's gone]

Or my other favorite of "We lost the phone, and I know there's this GPS thing on it. So you tell me right now where my phone is and who has it." Yeah, no, not so much, dude. WE don't do anything with the GPS like that. And no, adding a GPS locating feature NOW won't help you find it.


*rolls eyes*
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 01:47 pm (UTC)
You are a braver woman than I, Gunga Din. :: salutes ::
ariestess
Dec. 14th, 2007 01:48 pm (UTC)
*smirks* Oh, and those are the ones that are "easy" and job security, as I remind myself daily. That's not even including the ones that call me stupid/incompetent/etc when they don't get their way...

It really does still boggle my mind at how truly nasty people will get when they don't have to actually look the other person in the eye...
havocthecat
Dec. 14th, 2007 03:38 pm (UTC)
Dude. You know, the reason I got out of retail after college, and ran screaming from the world of sales, was to avoid people like this. Or at least excessive numbers of them. I have much respect for anyone who can work with the general public as a career.

Of course, I also have a high lack of respect for the people who are rude assholes to anyone who works with the general public.
ariestess
Dec. 14th, 2007 07:08 pm (UTC)
*heh* For the most part, I love my job. But there are some people who just drive me ass batty...
genevieve1352
Dec. 15th, 2007 02:16 am (UTC)
So true. Oh my God, SO true....
havocthecat
Dec. 14th, 2007 12:25 pm (UTC)
And people wonder why I'm abjectly grateful my position generally doesn't entail dealing directly with these people...

Oh, no, I definitely don't wonder that.
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 01:48 pm (UTC)
Seriously. One of the collectors' stock phrases is "The purpose of my call is...", with an eye toward keeping the conversation on point. I frequently find myself thinking "The purpose of my call is to alert you that you are much too stupid to run a business."
havocthecat
Dec. 14th, 2007 03:45 pm (UTC)
I frequently find myself thinking "The purpose of my call is to alert you that you are much too stupid to run a business."

Why do I get the feeling there needs to be a comedy sketch with the premise 'people on the phone say what they're thinking.'

...or possibly a vid with the premise 'people who don't say what they're thinking,' and then many captions. I guarantee that Cordelia, Anya (and probably Aeryn and Zoe too) would never once show up in that.
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 03:48 pm (UTC)
...or possibly a vid with the premise 'people who don't say what they're thinking,' and then many captions. I guarantee that Cordelia, Anya (and probably Aeryn and Zoe too) would never once show up in that.

*snorfle* Except perhaps in reaction shots to comment on the crazy people who curb their tongues...
havocthecat
Dec. 14th, 2007 04:05 pm (UTC)
The Truthful Person's Guide To Tact, perhaps? And I know you know which Cordelia line I'm thinking of.

Hrm. Do either of us have the possibility of putting together a vidding setup? I know we both should, but I know I don't have one put together (yet), and I don't think you do either. Because this is starting to look like it Must Be Done, and it would be far more enjoyable as a collaborative project.
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 04:09 pm (UTC)
I'm technically set, but vidding just hasn't been on the radar time-management-wise. Otherwise I'd have done "Jericho" and "Dance With The Angels" by now. :-/
phantomminuet
Dec. 14th, 2007 01:36 pm (UTC)
Five: I have not had enough caffeine this morning to take your idiocy in stride. I shall therefore mock you on LJ.

What did we do before LiveJournal? :-)
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 01:51 pm (UTC)
Scream and throw things? Or wail and gnash our teeth to sympathetic coworkers. Oh, wait, I still do that one.

I think if it hadn't started out addressing me by the wrong name, it would have slid by a little easier. I have, amusingly enough, lost count of the number of times in my life someone has randomly called me Vicki, just because it's most people's first guess when they remember it's something with a V. But Vanessa? When the quoted email header was right below it with my name?? O.o
finabair
Dec. 14th, 2007 08:36 pm (UTC)
Small, private mailing lists.
maiac
Dec. 14th, 2007 02:14 pm (UTC)
What are the odds that Debtor replied by asking unnecessary questions strictly as a stalling tactic? "You can't expect me to actually DO anything if I don't understand what you're telling me...."

I am so cynical.
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 02:21 pm (UTC)
Oh, those odds are pretty good. Although some of them really are that dense.

It's very difficult to be overly cynical in this business. *wry g* Which is one of the reasons I'd prefer to be out of it.

Thankfully, it's not my job to actually play that game through.
alyssa22
Dec. 14th, 2007 02:26 pm (UTC)
They called you Vanessa?

Reminds me of a girl I used to work with, Sophie, who got called Lucy all the time. She'd say "No, it's Sophie", and they'd say "Oh, Stacey".
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 02:36 pm (UTC)
*blink* I understand how you get from Valerie to Vanessa. (Well, if it hadn't been right in front of him.) Sophie to Lucy is a little more headscratchy...
alyssa22
Dec. 14th, 2007 03:41 pm (UTC)
I know. It was just bizarre. She'd be on the phone to people, and she'd go through that about three times a day. Insane.

Edited at 2007-12-14 06:42 pm (UTC)
kevenn
Dec. 14th, 2007 03:00 pm (UTC)
OMGs, I'm totally empathizing with you. I received an idiot response to an e-mail I sent today which could have been totally avoided if they had just READ THE DAMN E-MAIL.
wiliqueen
Dec. 14th, 2007 03:03 pm (UTC)
It seems to be an epidemic. I've seen no less than three people post in the last three weeks to the effect of "Am I writing in English? No, really? Because ARG."
maiac
Dec. 14th, 2007 04:05 pm (UTC)
In tech writing and tech support, the syndrome is known as RTFM: "Read the F------- Manual."

As a tech writer, I regularly shrug and comment, "Nobody reads the doc anyway," but a Tech Support team leader here has assured me that my work is appreciated. When somebody calls with a question they could have answered for themselves by reading the doc, at least the techie can refer them to the appropriate page instead of wasting time reciting the information to them.
( 23 comments — Leave a comment )

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